With an H

RMPletterMMistress wanted by Millionaire – 42 (West Side)

Woman wanted to serve as my mistress in my executive offices and my home. If you love to dress sexy in the hottest labels, know how to bring a man pleasure with your mind,body,and mouth and above all know how to be discreet I want to hire you.

Good eve,

Unfamiliar with this type of post,  I have all sorts of questions. Perhaps, my situation already precludes me from consideration.

If not, then yes, I’d be interested in learning more.

All the best, – Paij

craigslist 5121715331
I encourage u to respond I am looking for a woman in her fifties Sent from my…
Aug 21 (2 days ago)

Let’s talk, Paige. Call me. – The Man seeking the Mistress

Hello, Paij? Yes. Hello… Pardon me while i speak with my bartender and let him know i’m going out to the patio to speak with you. (muffled voices)…. There. Thank you for waiting. One has to take care of one’s staff, yes? I’m looking for someone full-time. I am seeking someone extremely submissive. Would you consider yourself submissive. Willing to role play, dress as my secretary, make some mistakes, deal with discipline? Good. How old are you? Mmmm. I am looking for someone in her 50’s.  Hmmm. Young.  I can adjust.  And how tall are you…okay. Weight? What is it?  Oh, you are rather thin.  Well, okay for your intelligence I will make an exception.  You are working full time? This will be 9-3. Some evenings hours if it works better. I pay $1,000 a day. Do you just enjoy writing about this or are you ready to do this? I’d like to meet you. Today. You are leaving town? You can still email while out of town. You won’t. You will not as you are out of town for pleasure…hmmm.. And send a photo before you leave.  Call me when you return.

Two days later after a phone call lasting 3:12 seconds this via email from Paij to John, with an H, and aware of the various risks.


When we next speak, or meet,  let’s clarify your expectations and mine. You were quick to accept alternative age and weight, which surprised me. It is important to me, you be pleased or this will not work as well as it could, yes?

Your Terms: Submissive has many definitions; extremely submissive requires some further discussion of expectations and sharing of limits. I am interested in dressing in designer labels in your executive suite or your home for 1K. I am not slave material. I do not seek to clean your bathroom with my toothbrush. I do not seek humiliations though I appreciate and respond well to verbal instruction and physical direction.

Hours and Location: Agree to 8-3pm availability. Rate must remain negotiable until we meet and finalize terms. Full-time implies? exclusivity? hours? Executive office location,  home location?

Health/Safety: Your current ddf paperwork is required as i prefer no condom use. Agreeable to NDA, however, for my own safety, I will have a discrete and location-informed party on call, during my time with you.

Photo attached per your request– Paij

You are gorgeous -John

Two days later, less rested than prior to departure, this email from Paij to John. 

Good Evening, I’ve returned home and am settled in for a quiet night. I’m sure there are reasons for my not finding Your photo gracing my inbox. –Paij

We discussed this call me. -John

We did not discuss “this”.- Paij

Perhaps you are confusing me with another applicant? Perhaps one from KC where I found a similar advertisement. -Paij

Silence. I see. Apparently you don’t like back talk… lol.- Paij

Sorry I was busy– John Sent from my iPhone

hmmm…a sorry?…didn’t expect that. -Paij

Long day?– Paij

Nasdaq was no quote for 2 hours long day. -John Sent from my iPhone

Ah, that will throw the schedule off… so your day had to be extended and tomorrow is already around the corner… You should have a nice beverage in hand, and dinner, but instead, mouthiness in the inbox.  My apologies. I can speak with you Friday, best time? and Yes, i am very skeptical. Especially given your name and your quick adjustment of age/size.  On Friday, we can discuss my interest in working for you in your executive office or home, while wearing whatever you desire. I’m skeptical about your intentions. Craigslist is notorious for monitoring ads for sex. –Paij

I am not nor have I ever been nor do I represent a member of law enforcement.  Perhaps a photo will alleviate your skepticism.  If I do not respond it is only because I am very busy and cannot always respond with alacrity. – John

I’m not sure what would alleviate my worry…any living previous employees available for reference check? grin. Send it yes, please. – Paij

Did u get the pic ? Still interested- John Sent from my iPad

Two hours later this via email from Paij to John with an H.

J, You are very intelligent. I find this attractive. But, you are dangerously intelligent when it comes to engaging in a submissive role. This worries me. Our brief conversation was at times, very relaxed, and then very terse. Were you not looking for a sub, i think i would go for this but alas, i’m just concerned i won’t be able to meet your needs as enthusiastically as someone who is more experienced in that area. I would not classify myself as extremely submissive. All the best– Paij

Then how about you serve as my eye candy either in my office or videos and pics- John Sent from my iPad



Imagining the possibilities, the risk, the learning, she called her friend in criminal justice who wanted to be her D and she called her FBI contact who served as her safety, who had declined to be her D.

#for Reticent Mental Property, August 24, 2013, image credit to sparkleyourcake.com

And he Was


s: Now you know what my days are like as well. I feed my mind with these kinds of thoughts.  I haven’t let myself go “there” for many years. My life here,  numb.  And I thought I was being a good girl, the good wife. But denial is not good for me and the more I explore and converse, the better (and worse!) it is in terms of wanting more. I can’t explain the attraction, it just has always been


I’m a thinker and have to be careful not to walk away, to run, when I need to be falling forward.  I’m safe with you, yes…?  I take all the risk in meeting you for this.




You are more than safe.  You will be respected, treated as you should be when with me.  I will be your escape from the everyday.  Be open and be yourself with me. I do not judge. Ask, say or do anything.




s: Hear me inhale sharply as I read your words, see how my head falls forward as I imagine time in your hands, my body slipping away, over the edge of safety. I’m getting lost here, so curious and hungry.  I want to be everything you wish me to be…I want to feel, I want to let go. I want to smell and taste, sweat and fly.  I want to know this,  my best self revealed,  my hunger finally fed but not satisfied.  I want the want, the anticipation, the need to be there, the crawling back to your capable hands, the calling me back to your creativity for more….more…more…



“Be so careful with me.”  Yes, she clearly remembers those words… “Be so, so careful.”  

#For Reticent Mental Property, August 16, 2013 photos credit adysmiles.com



Barter my Life, but not my Mind


“I have just realized that the stakes are myself

I have no other ransom money,

nothing to break or barter but my life.”

Diane di Prima

August 6, 1934: Happy birthday, Diane di Prima! A poet since she was a teenager, this Brooklynite became an integral part of the Beat movement and was once arrested by the FBI under an obscenity charge. She turns 79 today. (goodreads.com)


for RMP, image credit to bensonhurstbean.com



RMPholdinghandsbedI’m rolling over and waking you up…good morning….you should stay sleeping…it’s too early…roll over and spoon me into you….adjust your arm over my waist, rest your elbow on my hipbone and curl your hand over mine.

Let’s just lie here a little longer and let the light stream in and fill this place with the hushed sounds of morning…


#for Reticent Mental Property


Beyond Romance

RPMbwlovepoemDon’t be heartbroken, my future, as yet undiscovered new lover; romance isn’t dead.

At our age, it is just finely tuned, has more depth, is more satisfying on multiple levels and and doesn’t leave one crying into a pillow.

It doesn’t require purchasing diamond rings, though diamond earrings are okay.

It’s not called romance. It’s called something else…oh, it’s called mutual satisfaction…what is that…oh Carnal Knowledge? no…too rough…it’s emotional, but not a swoon….Yes, we swoon, but more from the entire self than a lightheaded feeling…it is guttural, stems from the core, it twists the entire body into a sweet pleasurable pain that can be repeated over and over and over.  It engages the mind, adds patient anticipation, yes, want and desire still rule.

And even better, it involves laughter, at one self, and each other, with each other.   It has touch, confident touch, a stroking touch and thrives on ordering someone around in the best way one can give orders. It’s is both sweet and sweaty, it is still consuming and hot and compelling.

In comparison, romance seems rather one-sided…


# For Reticent Mental Property, image credit doings-of-lovers-haiku.com blogspot

At the rail

RMPtangoI wish I were a girl again, half-savage and hardy, and free.

Emily Brontë– July 30, 1818: Reclusive and shy during her life, Emily Brontë achieved widespread fame after her early death at age 30, thanks to the publication of her only novel, Wuthering Heights. She was born in Yorkshire, England, 195 years ago today.(goodreads.com)

Good week,

I’m here making my world what it is.

Went out on the town with the other half for dinner at the Storm Club, (ever been?) all dressed up for so little atmosphere…but i made the best of it…next time, my pick…sushi!  20 years + more of endless dating and delay, more than half of my life invested.

Spent the evening putting my energy into the same heat i throw on-line and with my various exploratory male friends. His response was as it should be. I’ve still got it! i wasn’t really wondering..i know i have it, have something.

And here are the snippets i cannot tell my facebook friends or my family…the woman in me must share the mind behind the story…i think just to save my sanity, to let my words document my perceptions so when i’m wavering, wandering, i can re-read them and stand strong…for me, these words are for me…

Good looking, athletic, financially secure and he makes me cum, and whatever else i’m supposed to be attracted to vs. how great it is that i have been with someone else this year and felt that stirring, that dizzy, consuming heat , was sweaty and thirsty after, with our smells muddled together like the cocktail we only wish we could order at the rail when we are wanting…this gives me balance after all these years.

I want it all. I took it all.

I have no regrets…when i wipe his saliva off my face with the back of my wrist after his kiss, when i lock the door to the bedroom when he stretches his arms over head and raises his eyebrows, when I nod and support the same passive aggressive issues about the office, the friend, the family member– different characters, different day….i am no longer fighting the giving of my time and self … i have my words, my mind and body content, have found my peace in all the chaos i create.

I am pleased, pleasured, peaceful…

I am a girl again, hardy, savage and somehow, still free…

#for Reticent Mental Property