Reticent Mental Property

FEED My MIND: Adventure. Learn. Live. Write.

Tell yourself something else


She’s no one I know.

I can feel her blond hair brushing your shoulder and the heat of her temple where hers touches yours.  I tell myself she’s someone’s old friend. I tell myself she’s the gal who brings a laugh with your palm tree inspired mai-tai fix. Or maybe she just bought the last cold round of beer.

So what? Maybe she loves your kind of music or just found herself there needing to be found by somebody honest, somebody more than she’s had? She’s somebody’s old friend or your neighbor or maybe his wife, hmmm?

It doesn’t matter. Can’t matter. Can’t be learned. I can’t ask.

Keep me in my blinders the size of Texas. Social media doesn’t come with a soothing narrative. Stalking is for the off-balanced mess.

We feel what we feel, be damned.

And we ache where we hurt, until dawn.

I’m strong and I’m solid. I’m a force of the heart.

I’m the one who cares, but can’t.


She can’t ask for more when she offers so little

#for Reticent Mental Property.  Images courtesy of the web.

13 comments on “Tell yourself something else

  1. Marty
    September 25, 2015

    She shouldn’t need to ask


  2. Reticent Mental Property
    September 25, 2015

    She doesn’t want to need, either.


  3. eatonnav1
    September 27, 2015

    I like this madness!


  4. eatonnav1
    September 28, 2015

    The primal urges of an animal make it honest, the uncontrollable feeling of obsession, the bargaining with the wild animal of our obsession to tame it behind what we trap it behind most of the time. We like to think we don’t care, we are well adjusted adults, but we are only animals consumed by our primal urges.


    • Reticent Mental Property
      September 28, 2015

      Primal urges are recognized in this woman. However, they are controllable, the bargaining can yield acceptable compromise, and the obsession can be tamed into boundaries and rules…if needed. Some desires should not be curbed.

      Liked by 1 person

      • eatonnav1
        September 29, 2015

        Bargaining with madness, and placing rules on obsessions, seems like putting a leash on a wild wolf and saying it’s tamed. Either way this sounds like a woman I would be tragically drawn to. Haha!

        Liked by 1 person

  5. dievca
    September 29, 2015

    Oh, my, Ret. Where to go – what to do – how to be? Keep it simple. Want what you want. Need what you need. And Live. XO


  6. Reticent Mental Property
    September 29, 2015

    There’s nothing simple about the complexities of want vs need…except that the heart knows how to live; unfortunately, we are taught not to follow the heart.


  7. the constant opinion
    September 30, 2015

    I don’t know your strength with men. I was trying to write how I used to be that way. I was not. Before D/s I was always with sub-ish men and just going through the relationship motions. After D/s – being the “s” and so terribly naïve – I fell into a romantic/sexual abyss. Will I ever have the strength that you have? I know I admire it. I know anything it possible. But I am not able to go find out where I landed. I just don’t leave the hangar. Your posts give me something to reach for.

    xoxo ret



    • Reticent Mental Property
      October 1, 2015

      Hey beautiful. Strength is only a measure of what we are stacked up against at that moment…it shifts and changes…meaning, we can always become stronger. My strength is in my ability to walk away; I have no fear of the loss of something that doesn’t feed my best and most worthy parts. I value me. It’s a very selfish approach. And it seems to work. How does one learn to value oneself?? Many small steps and sometimes, fake it til you make it. Stand tall, Look people in the eye. Smile and always have a story to tell. A hundred kisses back to you, Dana. Rub them into your whole self. You are getting stronger. You are.

      Liked by 2 people

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This entry was posted on September 25, 2015 by in writing and tagged , .
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